To be perfectly honest, family dinner has been one of the biggest challenges for me as a new stepmom. Perhaps that sounds ridiculous, but until I settled down with The Husband and his man-children, I hadn’t sat down for mealtime with such monotonous regularity since I was a teenager. The Husband is used to the routine (he’s been doing it for years), but it’s taken me the better portion of the past year to digest the idea that dining at home involves more than just cheese and crackers. That said, I think it’s important for a family to set aside a chunk of time each day to connect, but there are those days when I think I might gag before the meal is over.
Family dinner has been one of the biggest challenges for me as a stepmom.
Surely, you say, dining with your ready-made family can’t be that much of a chore. It’s not that I can’t handle it (in fact, sometimes I’m perfectly entertained), but dining with children is not what I would describe as a relaxing experience. Especially, when you’re sitting across from kids who are not biologically your own and who developed their unique conversational style (bickering and often interrupting), and quirky chewing habits long before you came along.
I’m usually good for a solid stretch of four to five days and then I need a break. When I don’t get one, I become antsy and very afraid that the slightest gripe (this cheese smells like a flea collar) or primal influences (But, I like to eat couscous with my hands) might send me into hysterics so really, my negligence is doing the kids a favor.
As you can imagine, it was with great giddy pleasure that The Husband and I indulged last night in an expertly served and meticulously prepared eight-course meal outside the home. Mind you, we weren’t the only ones who abandoned their kitchens on a Sunday night. There were 25 of us who sat together at long, candlelit tables (sans kids) in a downtown art gallery; this is a growing trend in Austin: the Supper Club. Our meal took four hours to consume and included chestnut soup, scallops with caper and apricot relish, prime rib with yogurt and red wine jus and a chocolate tart with pomegranate sorbet that sent me over the edge.
If it sounds hoggish, it absolutely was, and if we’d left the boys at home alone with a pot of rubbery penne and four-dollar Ragu, I’d be suffering this morning from a guilt induced stomachache. But, they’re still out of town on winter break! The family dinner routine won’t start up again until tomorrow and by then, I’ll be ready to sit down to a simple meal at home with familiar faces.
Want to read more about dinner at Izzy’s house? Read this. Interested in hosteria verde supper club? Check it.
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I have the opposite problem…getting my family to all sit in one place to eat. K wants to eat in his room which is no longer allowed and hubby wants to sit in front of the t.v. K’s not the trouble maker in this case…it’s the hubby! But we generally all sit in the kitchen together and its nice.
You and the hubby’s night out to dinner sounds nice…and prime rib with yogurt and red wine jus sounds fab!
Your supper club sounds divine! I too find meal times difficult, as I have my diabetic Mother-in-law with a heart condition to steer away from coma inducing foods that manage to sneak into the refrigerator, and the step monster who grazes, all day, but actually eats nothing.
I’d say they don’t know one end of a vegetable from the other, except they absolutely know what to avoid at all costs. I do disguise it as something else (I roast bell peppers and other veggies and blend them and add to ground beef and call it “Pasta sauce – the English way” just to get some sort of vitamins into them).
The meal. MMM. MMM.MMM. I remember the day it started – racing from work early for my Wednesday night stepmother dinner. Wednesdays turned into weekends and then my bio kids came along and be damned if we don’t eat dinner every night. I enjoy it now. However, if there is one complaint about the food, it’s away from the table you go. Drinking early while preparing dinner greatly helps.
Oh yes! Drinking while cooking is a must. Strong cocktails.
That’s truly hilarious. I have four of the little darlings, each with his/her own variation on how eating should be done. It’s amazing that I’ve survived all of the family dinners so far without developing a serious twitch from their “quirky chewing habits.” :)
Sounds like dinner with your Supper Club was just what the doctor ordered…
It sure was. I highly recommend it.
Hi Izzy, Kathy and I tagged you with a “Roar for powerful words” award over at The DHX — http://www.thedhx.com/2008/01/11/roar/ — I don’t know if you do memes, but we’d love to hear your writing tips. You are a powerful writer.
Well, how about that! I will happily oblige…when I have more than five minutes to sit down and write:)
As a new stepmother and one who does not cook very well at that, I share your thoughts on family meals. Our stepson is living with us for the first time in about 6 years (well, me, not his dad), and every meal is a struggle, as he seems to have developed an eating disorder in our absence. I just go one meal and one pound at a time with him, but it is NOT easy.
Okay, so I have aquired a family of 4…all under the age of 13….the divorce is new…and my biggest challenge, I can’t seem to cook anything right. Even kraft dinner….apparently mom makes it better…I follow the instructions to a “T” and I still can’t get it right…help!
Sounds like he’s missing mom… and not the food. I’m sure it’s not really a commentary on how you cook. Stick with it.
Yeah, I’m in a similar boat. A lot of what I cook gets picked apart and critiqued and sometimes even outright rejected. Even when I’m cooking the exact same frozen dinner they say they like and following the directions. I’m still chewing through this one. It *really* bugs me. Plus I worry about their health. They’ve become much more polite about it (after me crying and telling them how much it hurts my feelings), but it’s a problem.
And just for the record, I really can cook! http://www.pasadenahousewife.com/2008/01/21/making-sourdough-starter-from-scratch/
I cant believe I missed this post, Izzy. It’s funny too, because I just finished writing a long long post about table manners and then POOF it vanished. I figure it’s for the best, my post was more venting than anything else. Not only does Jan like to tell me my food is gross, she also likes to toot at the dinner table and slurp her drinks. She would giggle and say “excuse me”….I put up with this for about a year and a half. Recently, I lost it – I told her she had “bad table manners and she made eating dinner with her not fun, because she is so rude”.
I felt horrible.
But I had reached my limit. I tell ya…family dinner is a challenge, and one I am FAR from mastering.